There’s a mess of red lights smeared across your vision. The sky is no longer visible through the thick haze of the pouring rain. It almost feels like you aren’t moving, but beneath the chattering of the high-velocity raindrops colliding with the metal roof, you can still make out the hum of the engine.

“God, I can’t see a thing. Fuck this weather.” You curse the clouds in a low voice.

“I dunno. I still love the way the rain looks. And the sound it makes.”

You sigh. “Well, you’re not the one driving in it.”

“You say that as if I’ve never driven in rain before…” The person sitting next to you looks at you, a bit perplexed.

“Oh. I forgot when we are. Forget I said that.”

“What?”

Nobody speaks for a few moments. The occasional crashing sounds as the wheels periodically pass through puddles become deafening.

“Why do you think I keep doing this?” You don’t make eye contact, as you’re busy trying to stay on the road.

“Doing what?”

“You know what I’m talking about. We’re not fooling anybody.” You mutter almost inaudibly. They let out a slow sigh.

“I’m only answering like this because we both know you want me to. It’s always felt better to play pretend.” They pause for a few moments.

“I don’t think there’s something wrong with you, and I know that’s what you were asking. Somehow, all this time was never enough for anybody. If you’re going to do this to comfort yourself, why are you trying to torture yourself even in the confines of your own coping mechanism?”

“It’s just… I keep coming back to these even though I really want to be living in the moment. It’s not like I’m stuck in a rut, I’m as fulfilled as a person could be… so, why come back?”

“Are you asking me to pretend to know something that you don’t? It’s human nature to romanticize the little things. You even hated the rain as it happened, but now you’re treating it as a blessing, just like I always did. Just… in a different way.”

“No, fuck the weather. I’m here for you, not the weather.”

“You’re deluding yourself pretending it didn’t contribute.”

“Whatever…” You trail off. The rain has lightened up a little bit.

“Come on, you took so long feeling sorry for yourself that the best part’s almost over! Let’s just get back into character and enjoy it, okay? Just let yourself be happy.”

“… Alright.”